


Impossible Feelings

by HiMiTSu



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-22
Updated: 2011-01-22
Packaged: 2017-10-14 23:21:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/154588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HiMiTSu/pseuds/HiMiTSu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by myth about Pygmalion. A mechanic created a human like robot. He gave his robot a life. Another man gave the robot feelings but never gave him a choice. Spanner/Shoichi</p>
            </blockquote>





	Impossible Feelings

**Author's Note:**

> Author: HiMiTSu (HiM'e'iTSu)  
> There is so little Spanner/Shoichi fanfiction. I think they deserve more:)  
> This in an AU. Still takes place in Namimori. This story was mostly inspired by a myth about Pygmalion (and maybe a little bit by Chobits).

**Impossible Feelings**

There are lots of talented people in the world, but only a few of them know how to use their potential, how to reveal their talent to it's highest and create the impossible. Taking something difficult and opening it's simplicity, making beauty and turning ugliness into pure attractiveness – a real talent can more than this. Much more.

In a city which was the main capital of technology, on one of the busieststreets of a giant modern megalopolis lived a man. He was a mechanic, ordinary at sight, but best of his kind. A man who loved his job; for him it was more then just a profession – it was his life; no one held such devotion to their vocation. Even the real name of that man couldn't be recalled by the oldest people who knew him even though he was still young. He was called Spanner.

What most people considered boring **,** he found fascinating. Maybe that was a reason why he didn't have many friends; talk always died with the lack of appropriate themes, there wasn't anything in common between him and the others. He loved mechanics, could spend days assembling and disassembling engines, his head was full of formulas and schematics all the time. The idea of time was unknown to him, day or night it didn't matter; he worked whenever he felt like it. . And he never considered the idea of loneliness, didn't think of himself as a lonely person. Life outside his workshop in the basement of his house continued, unnoticed by Spanner. He created robots and they were loyal friends and servants, always appearing at his first call bringing needed tools and listening to his mathematical musings without interfering or complaining. That was all that he needed in his world of mechanized delight.

As a person gifted with great talent and an equally restless mind, Spanner always had a need to take his next work to a higher level, improve his skills further, to create something absolutely new. Having designed several robots, the one called 'moska' was the most impressive and innovative one that he had created so far, Spanner decided that the time had come for him to create something entirely different. And so he stumbled upon an idea of creating a human-like robot. Choosing the design at random, more interested in the mechanics that would make it actually work, Spanner started to work on his idea.

A heart would come first. With cogwheels and small bolts it was odd for a heart, yet it still resembled one. As days passed, seasons changed, people came to his house for help with their electronic devices and left with their thanks falling on deaf ears as the mechanic was already engrossed in next job, his creation beginning to take shape and about to start its mechanical life. It took an ample amount of time to work on and it was rather difficult to build, a challenge he longed for, which exhausted him often and sometimes even angered when he couldn't find the rightdetail or choose the perfectcolor for the robot's eyes. After days of debates with himself Spanner finally decided on green; not the bright green which people compare to grass on a beautiful sunny day and not aquamarine blue green like the color of sea waves; but a simple light, and almost dull at times, yet still a rathercalming green color. They seemed lifeless complimented by pale skin but Spanner liked them that way. The hair was ginger because the mechanic remembered how in childhood red used to be his favorite color. He didn't have any particular preferences currently **,** but his instinct lead him and Spanner just followed. He was used to listening to what people call the conscious or that small inner voice of reason, it always never failed in helping to improve his creations.

So as a year and a half passed in his workshop Spanner had created a magnificent being. His new robot. No, this word seemed too vulgar for his new creation. It was a human. A young man, ordinary in height, thin with long arms and a small lean frame; pale skin with a faint, healthy glow; eyes big, green as Spanner wanted, not taking too much space up on his bony face with straight nose and perfectly shaped lips. As it, no _he_ , stood in the center of mechanic's workshop supported by metallic reliance Spanner couldn't take eyes from his creation. It was far from perfect in a sense of looks but he didn't want it to be like that. Itsmechanics were highly innovative, unique, and brilliant **-** the red headed man was the one who wouldn't stand out in a crowd.

Days later when Spanner was getting everything ready to start mechanical heart he realized that his creation needed a name – such trivial problems never bothered him before. Naming it Moska seemed as blasphemous as calling it a robot. This young man needed a proper name.

Even though Spanner didn't have actual friends as in sense of people he constantly communicated with he still had good acquaintances, people with whom he could meet up and even chat a little without feeling like it was too much a bother. One of those people was the boss of a huge corporation, who from time to time hired Spanner as advisor for their projects. Vongola Corp. was one of the biggest and most influential companies on the world market. The boss, Sawada Tsunayoshi, was a fine young man, too talkative sometimes and doubting himself and his self worth, but he was rather simple to figure out, honest and kind. He had six closest aides, all different and independent but loyal, though Spanner didn't socialize with them much.

So Tsunayoshi was the one who, after a lot of embarrassed rambling, suggested a name. Spanner approved it.

Standing before his creation Spanner unplugged the wires breaking last connection between his creation and a large computer; a mechanism had its own power source. Slowly Spanner took a step back admiring his work, a smile of satisfaction forming around a stick of a lollipop constantly hanging from the corner of his lips. Carefully he reached one hand and with a light touch activated the system. No glow, no music, no micro explosions – just pale green eyes opening and staring at the mechanic in wonder.

Spanner crunched strawberry lollypop breaking it in tiny peaces as his smile grew wider and aquamarine eyes glinted with excitement.

His creation was perfect. His creation had a name. Irie Shoichi was alive.

*****

Weeks passed and Shoichi's self-educational program opened him new horizons of knowledge every day. It appeared he loved science. He understood mechanics easily but it didn't captivate him as much as physics or math did. Once Spanner wondered aloud why didn't Shoichi want to know more about his 'body' but the redhead answered that he already knew enough to keep himself functional in emergency. The mechanic didn't ask any more.

The first couple of days after the activation Shoichi wasn't good with balance but hehad an incredible learning curve which had him learning things fast, so he now moved smoothly and almost gracefully, without taking into account the almost constant stumbling and bumping into things; Spanner suspected that was not false of a flawed program. He corrected Shoichi's navigation skills twice – it didn't improve a thing.

After two weeks of his 'life' Shoichi discovered he had an imagination. It was a shock to Spanner but he couldn't find any other word to what his ward was doing. The redhead made scientific experiments, but not only did he repeat the ones he had read about he also thought of new ones. His own experiments. Moreover they gave results. Spanner could never predict that the self-educational program he designed could give such results.

When Spanner worked Shoichi sat on a plush sofa which the mechanic had specifically moved down to the workshop and read one book after another. The silence was no different from usual one but with additional person present in the room Spanner was in a better mood, was more productive-which had him smiling quietly to himself.

Once when he was developing a new mobile model for Vongola Corp. he asked in his usual monotonous voice for a specific tool expecting mini-moska to bring it.

"Here." Soft voice attracted his attention.

Spanner almost jumped at Shoichi's voice. The blond turned from his position on the floor – he preferred the floor to desks – and saw his redheaded robot standing behind him, bending forward with one hand on his knee supporting his weight and the other handing Spanner needed tool. He was also smiling. That was how Spanner found out that robots could actually becharming. The smile was so kind and sincere that the mechanic had trouble remembering that it was not a human being before him but a robot programmed to be polite and helpful. No program could teach you to be sweet or cute. Irie Shoichi was both that and so much more.

*****

It was evening when Spanner didn't have much to do; his job for a day was completed and if he started doing next day's task he'd be bored immensely for two more days. Instead of introducing himself to more boredom, he left his workshop in search of Shoichi. It was easy to find the redhead in a living room – a place he barely visited himself – sitting in front of a TV. His posture was calm but collected and he looked somewhat alien in such domestic furnishing. Shoichi had no concept of 'relaxed' at all. He was watching a comedy show with laughter ranging on the background every time main character said something funny.

When Spanner entered the room he turned his head, there was an expression of confusion on his face.

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

Spanner looked at the screen again thinking about appropriate response. Personally he didn't find those shows appealing, other people though…

"Yes." He answered sitting down beside Shoichi.

They watched it for a half an hour in silence until the redhead voiced his opinion:

"I don't think it's funny."The redheadcommented when final credits appeared. "I watched it all from the beginning to the end and never had any urge to act like those people on the screen."

"They laughed." Spanner gave a name to peoples' reaction. "There is nothing wrong with it though...I find it boring too."

"Laughed…" The redhead repeated staring at his lap. "Can I…laugh?"

Spanner considered it for a moment. He knew that the program could imitate human emotion, but was that enough to make Shoichi _really_ laugh? Would he ever feel happy just because he wanted to and not because his program predicted it as a best way to act in a situation? With regret the blond mechanic understood that no matter how perfect his creation is,all that Shoichi could do was imitate emotions but never feel them.

"Yes, sure." Spanner muttered casually.

He didn't understand his unwillingness to retell Shoichi his revelation. He probably justdidn't want to see disappointment in his pale green eyes…even if it was programmed.

*****

One day Spanner noticed that there was something wrong with Shoichi. He though nothing of it at first **,** but every time he passed redhead's room, he had his own room now with door widely open all the time, the young man was reading with a heavy book almost perched on the end of his nose. When he asked why, Shoichi reluctantly admitted that something must have happened to the lances which were the basic element of his electronic eyes. They were not working as good as before.

After an examination Spanner came to a conclusion that the eyes had fully adjusted to the shape of Shoichi's eye sockets which was good but they misshaped in process decreasing redhead's sight. Deciding it'd be too much of a bother to make full repairs he followed an easy solution. He made Shoichi glasses. Big with square lances grey rimmed they suited the redhead nicely. Shoichi endorsed them as well.

*****

Half a year passed and Spanner couldn't imagine his life without constant presence of Shoichi at his side. The robot, now admitted as a justified human and co-owner of the house, tidied up Spanner's mess, cooked when he felt like it but mostly just kept the other company. When the blond worked from his workshop he could hear sounds of explosions coming from redhead's room. Shoichi liked his experiments. It worried Spanner at first, but then he got used to it.

Sometimes during day Shoichi sat in Spanner's workshop occupying the same sofa which he domesticated by that time, reading scientific reports on recent discoveries. They talked throwing occasional phrases, exchanging glances and smiles.

Spanner liked their evenings; after a simple meal since neither of them liked cooking, they settled in the living room, discussing over quiet rambling of the television what Shoichi had read earlier that day. One evening a week they played chess or watched a movie, not a comedy, because either of them obviously lacked sense of humor.

There were times when Spanner was rudely reminded that Shoichi wasn't human even if he looked like one. In movies there were scenes he couldn't understand and the blond was stuck attempting to explain why the hero rushed into ultimate danger to save the girl instead of running away like robot's logic suggested. The redhead had no concept of attraction or affection, he didn't know love. Sometimes, but only sometimes, Spanner wished he did.

It was Friday, a 'movie day' as Shoichi called it. Spanner was in his workshop improving new type of communicator invented in Vongola Corp. – the task challenging enough to make him forget about his surroundings. Fifteen minutes past four he was roughly dragged back to reality by an explosion two floors above. The sound came form Shoichi's place and it was too strong for normal.

Spanner left workshop and fled up the stairs, corridor on the second floor was filled with smoke, smell of burning in the air. The door to Shoichi's room was open like always and as Spanner hesitated on a threshold he could see a fire starting on the laboratory table and the redhead lying on the floor beside it. He rushed inside and stopped as he reached over to check his pulse, remembering that that was unneeded, stood up and calmly distinguished small fire with water from nearest flower vase.

If Shoichi was human you could tell he fell unconscious, using robot's terminology you'd say his system shut down. Spanner lifted him up carefully and took down to the workshop. After repairing minor damage caused by explosion he got ready to reboot the robot.

His hand dropped half way to needed button. Spanner looked closely at the unmoving _lifeless_ face and fear filled his senses. Shoichi didn't have emotions, couldn't feel affection – that meant only his memories connected the two of them. What if they were destroyed with reboot? How will that be? Will they have to start everything from the beginning? Will Spanner be fine with it?

No-He wouldn't be.

With that thought he pushed the button.

*****

Another Friday, week after the accident, found Spanner in his workshop again. Shoichi was in there with him, re-reading scientific magazines. It was quiet, only sound – beeping of the communicator the mechanic was still working on. When Spanner finished with new chip – a task difficult and needing full concentration – Shoichi asked:

"Should I stop with the experiments?"

If Spanner didn't know better he'd have thought his voice sounded concerned or full of repentance.

"Do you want to?"

After the incident when Shoichi opened his eyes a first thing Spanner wanted to do was to ban him from any further experimenting. Explosion didn't damage his body, memories were also intact except for the ones of the day of the incident. There was no end to Spanner's relief at that.

"I don't think there is another good way to use my abilities."

If the redhead was human it could have sounded like "I'd be bored without it."

"Fine. Just be careful next time."

"Thank you." Shoichi smiled at him.

Lately Spanner caught himself comparing Shoichi to a human being too many times. It surprised him since the blond mechanic realized that he _wanted_ the redhead to be human.

So when Spanner finished with the communication device, leaving the the rest of the work to Vongola's professionals, he started on a new plan. He couldn't place what exactly it was supposed to be, not yet understanding how he wanted to give Shoichi _feelings_. It sounded impossible even without voicing the idea out. Is it crazy trying to make a robot independent from his own program? But Spanner wanted it. He had the time, the talent, and the drive to do so.

*****

Spanner knew this would be difficult. Most of the time free from his actual job the blond spent on attempts to figure out how to turn mechanized and programmed emotions into spontaneous real ones. Sometimes he got a feeling like he was so close to finally creating it but lacked details to complete it, to make it work. His confidence wavered with every day of failure; even Shoichi's reassurance didn't help any more. The redhead didn't know what the mechanic was working on assuming it was another project for Vongola Corp. and offered help every day despite the fact that it was rejected. It made the robot feel sad or at least he thought that was how sadness should feel.

Help came from an unexpected source. One evening Spanner got a visit from a man he had heard a lot about but never got to meet in person. A stranger with white messy hair spiking in every direction possible and dressed in immaculate white suit appeared on Spanner's doorstep one morning. He introduced himself as 'Byakuran'.

Byakuran offered help.

"I've been following your work." The man said with a small, knowing smile that Spanner didn't like, sitting on the sofa in the living room. "I should admit I'm quiet impressed."

"Hn." Was all Spanner had to answer.

"We tried making human like robots. I'm sure you mast have heard about Millefiore."

Of course Spanner did; a huge company, the biggest opponent of Vongola with Byakuran as their leader. The mechanic was offered work at that company once but denied the offer. Main focus of this company was weaponry – that's why Spanner didn't like them. Thatand the boss gave creeps everyone who'd met him.

"You know we had a success in this area – at least we thought we did. Before I heard of your creation, that is." Byakuran's violet eyes narrowed as he eyed Shoichi. "He's perfect."

The redheaded robot didn't react to the praise; it didn't feel right coming from this man's mouth. He sat in a chair close to the blond mechanic and studied white haired man; his words, his reaction, his narrowed eyes and lips curved into a sly smile – all that told him not to trust their guest.

"I'm not selling him if that's what you want." Spanner warned calmly.

"Oh no." Byakuran hastened to reassure with a wave of right hand dismissing the idea. "I came to offer you an alliance of some sort."

The mechanic kept silent listening carefully which Byakuran took as an opportunity to continue.

"Even though I said earlier that your creation is perfect I can see that it's incomplete."

"What do you mean?" It was Shoichi who asked the question.

"You are a human like robot. More robot than a human." Byakuran explained pleasantly. "I can change that."

Shoichi stared at the man speechless, his mechanical brain processing information but failing to open up meaning of Byakuran's words to the robot. The redhead wanted to ask for explanation but Spanner beat him.

"How?"

"Oh so you are interested?" White haired man inquired with a smile before his tone turned to a business-like. "My technologists invented a very interesting device. I called it Tri-ni-sette. It uses three different types of power, you see. It's long and, believe me, pretty tedious to explain how it works. What _is_ important it _what_ it does. It can make Sho-chan more human that robot."

The familiarity with which Byakuran addressed Shoichi didn't get lost over the importance of the statement. Spanner didn't trust this man in the slightest. But there was no need for him to lie about such a thing. The prospect of finishing his project…To give Shoichi real emotions…

"What do you want in return?"

"Not much." Millefiore boss shrugged taking a candy from table between them. "Sho-chan will have to stay at Millefiore so that we can keep a close eye on him. Just to make sure everything goes well. He'll be absolutely free. May even get a job in our laboratories if he wants. Of course you'll stay at our base as well. We don't want to separate master and his creation."

Conditions definitely didn't match category 'not much' in Spanner's opinion, but chances they gave were great as well. He glanced at Shoichi whose face was blank and unreadable as he still tried to fully understand Byakuran.

"Fine." Spanner murmured deciding their fate.

*****

Millefiore had their own building, one of the highest in the city, a skyscraper with ahundred floors going up in the sky and down under the ground. Spanner chose himself a large room on the fifth level of dungeons, Shoichi living next to him. The mechanic kept an eye on his creation all the time not letting the redhead out of his sight. Even though their lives settled into a normal rhythm again he felt worried. Byakuran obviously wasn't a man to let others have full control of the situation.

Tri-ni-sette appeared to be a difficult shaped microchip with three cords leading to a power source as Byakuran promised earlier. Shoichi didn't say anything to the idea of inserting it into his system, but Spanner thought he looked at it as at upgrade. For a second they stopped Shoichi's 'life'; Spanner felt like his own heart stopped during that moment, when the redhead opened his eyes it sped up its rhythm. Same question as before bothered him again. What if in process Shoichi's memories got defected?

"Spanner." The redhead murmured looking into aquamarine eyes of his creator soothing his worries.

The mechanic smiled. Suddenly he felt so much happier, and it wasn't just a satisfaction of a perfectly done job. It was pure joy. The redhead's smile matched his.

"Wonderful! It worked just the way it had to." Byakuran's cheerful exclamation broke their silent communication.

Shoichi looked at the white haired man as if he had just noticed his presence.

"Thank you, Byakuran-san." He thanked, his tone emotionless, yet different from what it was seconds before.

"It's a pleasure to me, Sho-chan."

His cheerfulness, his joy with no chance to defy if it was real or faked – Shoichi didn't like that.

*****

After that tests started. Supplemented with experiments, Shoichi liked so much in the past but now when he became a subject of them he didn't find any fun in them, and questionings from different scientists they exhausted him. He suddenly got a very strong sympathy for lab rats. Spanner and Byakuran were always at his side, one watching with concern the other with interest. By the end of the day he found his eyelids closing without any permission from his brain.

"Are you tired, Sho-chan?"

"Tired?" Shoichi mumbled. "So that's how it feels like?"

It was not an imitation of exhaustion when the program came to a conclusion that he stayed awake long enough based on a thorough analysis of his reactions. Now it was actual tiredness, with his limbs aching slightly of overuse, decreased concentration and sleepiness. Shoichi liked it. It was a _feeling_. It made him want to experience more of them.

"Yes." Spanner answered question the redhead already forgot asking.

Nonetheless he turned to mechanic with a small smile.

"Funny."

And Shoichi instantly fell asleep in an uncomfortable laboratory chair.

*****

They were in Spanner's workshop at the Millefiore. It didn't feel the same as at their home but both were grateful for a chance of some resemblance of their normal calm lifestyle, for a chance to enjoy each others company in private. True to his word Byakyran gave Shoichi a job at the company and also kept Spanner busy with minor projects that weren't connected to weaponry. It was a far cry from their normal life before but still nice.

They played chess, and Spanner was losing. A comedy show was on playing in the background, there wasn't much of a difference from the times when Shoichi didn't have Tri-ni-sette inserted in his system, but now every time redhead frowned or smiled or looked up with confusion or maybe interest it was because he actually _wanted_ it.

"Sorry but…check mate." For a moment the redhead looked apologetic until his face broke into a victorious grin.

"Oh, I just can't win against you, can I?" Spanner asked rhetorically, leaning back in his chair.

It was quiet while Shoichi hid away board and figures, not classical but made of metal and shaped as mechanical tools – made personally by Spanner, sound of television floating over the room. Popular stand up comedian acting before audience.

And then the workshop filled with unusual sound. Spanner almost fell over with the chair he was sitting on and he could swear he heard his neck crack as he turned around to look at the redhead. _Shoichi was laughing_. Abeautiful laugh, lacking any mechanical undertone – absolutely normal, escaping his lips with enviable ease. It sounded so natural, captivating Spanner with its loveliness. As Shoichi felt he was stared at he tore his gaze from the TV to look at the blond.

"Sorry." He said, chuckling refusing to die down against his will. "Don't know what's wrong with me. I guess its…funny?"

Spanner's amused eyes looked at the screen still holding an opinion that it was ridiculously boring. But if Shoichi liked it…The blond smiled.

"Yes. Maybe."

*****

Shoichi got more and more work, with his computerized brain he could easily deal with any task but he was saddened by the fact that he wasn't able to spend as much time with Spanner as he wanted. It felt like they were drifting apart, but the need to stay close to the blond mechanic, to have a chance at least briefly see him every day was enough to surpass all those fears. Thestrength of those emotions surprised him.

Shoichi had so many things to work on, feeling too obliged to do so for Byakuran because of what he did for him to reject any of his requests. Two assistants were always present at his side, assigned to help him or more like to watch him. Moreover he was politely asked to move to higher level, he didn't have strength to fight back the 'gentle' order from Byakuran. Distance between him and Spanner grew.

*****

Spanner stared at details on his low table but didn't feel any passion for working. He had not seen Shoichi in a week, they only spoke once through the computer and even during the talk the redhead was whisked away by one of those annoying women. Spanner hated them but most of all he couldn't stand Byakuran, a man who was slowly stealing Shoichi away from him. He hated Millefiore and every single worker there.

And then a day came when he couldn't stand it anymore. Byakuran, who had studied Spanner's previous work, asked him to improve moska; the problem was that in white haired man's language 'improve' meant 'turn into a deadly weapon'. Spanner didn't like that task in the slightest, he despised himself for agreeing. He understood perfectly that denying his boss's request he'd make himself useless in the corporation; there was no way he'd risk being thrown out when there still was a chance for him to be around Shoichi. Even if they met just for a minute to say 'Hello' until the redhead would be reminded about his work by a pink-haired secretary. Until he still had those little bits of affection from the young man, until he saw the same regret in Shoichi's eyes when they parted – he'd stay at Millefiore.

Halfway through developments to the new moska he stumbled upon a new kind of problem – the model was bigger, had new functions with addition of weapons. Which meant that a more powerful source of energy was required. Spanner spent days searching for solution but when he finally realized _what_ could give enough energy to make the machine work up to its potential…that day he also understood it was his time to leave Millefiore.

Using _that_ as a power source was never an option to him. It was impossible but not in a physical way but in moral. I'd be illegal, dangerous, inhuman, disgusting…but if Byakuran found out he wouldn't hesitate to use it immediately. Can Spanner let that happen?

The next day he destroyed drawings, calculations and the machine itself and left without saying a word. The price for staying with Shoichi was just becoming too steep...

*****

"It's a pity, isn't it? We are thrown back in our research."

Shoichi was informed about Spanner's leave two days after it actually happened. Now he sat in a white uncomfortable chair in what had became his room, white and sterile with predominance of glass and metal, listening to how Byakuran's projection on the screen lamented on the 'failure'. His voice cheerful as ever while giving bad news, rambling about not noticing that Shoichi was trapped in the world of his own thoughts.

He felt betrayed. It was a new ugly feeling that he never wanted to experience.

Even though they barely saw each other knowledge that Spanner _was_ somewhere close by wormed Shoichi's heart. Now he felt plain loneliness. Every time Byakuran connected him, every time one of his secretaries called out to him, with every talk with employees he felt empty and pathetic. Apathy dominated in his life, but he tried hard in his work in order to meet implied expectations as Spanner's 'best creation'. He hated the term and was proud of it at the same time.

Sometimes he wondered what made the blond mechanic just fled the company without any short note. And sometimes, once or maybe twice, Shoichi dreamed about leaving as well and finding him. But then he remembered how the man didn't even warn the redhead and he felt left behind all over again; also the reminder of his obligating gratitude to Byakuran followed him all the time – literally in form of two pink haired secretaries. Leaving would mean refusing the only thing making him human. Tir-ni-sette bounded him to white haired sweet talking demon stronger than any blood signed contract. There were days when it seemed a nice prospect to get rid of emotions, absolutely forgetting what the feeling of hurt meant.

But what is the point in freedom if you can't enjoy it? And since when did he start referring to himself as to caged bird? Was a meeting with Spanner worth loosing everything he had learnt? The immediate answer that came to him was 'Yes'. Thinking carefully Shoichi realized that it might not be that simple. With emotions and feelings he had also gained insecurities. His first fear to experience – fear of rejection. What if Spanner though of him only as a finished creation and moved on to make new discoveries? While being in the dark the redhead still had his hopes; even though Byakuran obviously worked hard to shatter them Shoichi clung to them all the same.

So he worked. And he dreamt of a meeting he feared that would never happen.

*****

Spanner planned new project for Vongola. He tried returning home but after spending two lonely nights at the empty house he packed his belongings and moved to the large building which was a base to Sawada's corporation. Long corridors and spacious halls full of people all busy and rushing from one office to another. At least they didn't rise in him feeling of distrust. Tsuna was a good boss and his assistants though all different, each with his own quirk, were immensely loyal to him. Unlike in Byakuran's case this loyalty was built on friendship not on fear. It created an atmosphere so unlike the one in Millefiore.

No matter how much Spanner liked it here he missed Shoichi. Before he never realized how big and empty his house was, but with the redhead around it always seemed full. Shoichi kept him company, scolded and praised the mechanic, he became an inevitable part of Spanner's life. Now when that part was gone…he was lonely. But no one other than him from variety of people around could fill it. His old 'friend' mini-moska wasn't enough anymore.

Time passed and Spanner worked – it was his only pleasure in a dull life. In Vongola he liked whatever his project was but still couldn't put all his passion to a new creation. One day Tsuna called Spanner to his office, his three closest men also present: silver haired short-tempered Gokudera Hayato, always happy and absent minded Yamamoto Takeshi and extremely loud but always ready to act Sasagawa Ryohei. They had news about Millefiore's new invention. Spanner was not going to like it.

*****

"You are brilliant, Sho-chan!"

Shoichi was in Byakuran's office for the second time he joined Millefiore. Praise from the boss did absolutely nothing for his sour mood if any it only made it worse. He had only mentioned that duplicates of pictures of new moska should be kept at Spanner's computer back at his house since the talented mechanic always held copies of important documents. A week later – and they were in Byakuran's hands. Shoichi never regretted his habits of always automatically answering questions more in his short life. Now there was no turning back and his white haired boss asked Shoichi to finish Spanner's work. The redhead agreed without hesitation; he couldn't let anyone other them him continue this.

For the first time he noticed a contradiction in his feelings: wanting to finish blonde's new creation and understanding that it should never be completed. Spanner wouldn't destroy it without a reason.

Shoichi left Byakuran's office, by the time lift reached fifth level he already had a suitable solution.

*****

It was finished. Someone managed to complete creation of his King Moska. Spanner had only one person in mind that was capable of doing that. It wasn't a reassuring thought.

*****

Tsuna stood up, hand on the desktop as he read a document before him. Gokudera, having already seen it, was pacing boss's office along a large window. He glanced at Yamamoto and Sasagawa occupying a couch on the other side of the room.

"Well," Tsuna started uncertainly. "It's good, isn't it?"

"It is." Gokudera answered quickly. "We have to hurry up though. While they haven't started experimenting."

"We have all evidence we need to corner Byakuran." Yamamoto added.

Tsuna nodded, then carefully put the documents back into the black folder.

"We have to inform Spanner." He noticed.

"You talked with him about it two days ago." Gokudera said. "He knows they finished the machine."

"Yes, but he doesn't know about _this_." Tsuna waved a folder a bit then hid it safely in a case.

"Shouldn't we take him with us?" Yamamoto inquired.

"We'd be fine without him!"

"But it's not fair, Octopus-Head!" Sasagawa protested a little bit too loud fro his friends' comfort.

"No one asked you, Lawn-Head!"

They started bickering and as Yamamoto tried to reconcile them the noise always pursuing Tsuna filled the spacious office. Thankfully, he was used to it to an extent where he wasn't paying any attention to the shouting. Instead he phoned Spanner. The man was in a sour mood since he heard of recreation of King Moska so maybe he'll be relieved to hear the news? Still Tsuna couldn't believe that anyone, even as heartless as Byakuran would agree to use human's life as a power source for a machine…

*****

It was quiet in Byakuran's office. The furnishing was simple with white sofas facing each other and a coffee table between them; large windows were only source of light, in a brightness of midday sun it was enough though. One sofa with its back facing the window was occupied by Byakuran only, sprawled across it, posture relaxed and violet eyes running along the lines of a document in his hand. Behind his sofa Shoichi stood, green eyes downcast and fingers nervously twirling material of his white jacket. He felt highly uncomfortable in the white suit with black shirt underneath, all supplemented with a black tie. Across from them three people were sitting: Tsuna in the center, eyes never leaving Byakuran's face, scrutinizing it in search of any signs of worry; other two – Gokudera on his right, relaxed but collected, and Spanner on the left, one leg thrown over the other and a hand casually lying on the back of the white sofa, head thrown back as if studying pristine white ceiling. Behind them were Yamamoto and Sasagawa, both lacking their air-headed attitude.

There was silence as neither of men found a need to speak as Byakuran read what Tsuna had called 'evidence'

"Huh…Interesting." White haired boss murmured throwing papers on the table carelessly. "So?"

"You have to stop this project." Tsuna answered. "We can decide everything in peace."

"I'm sorry but I have to decline your offer." Byakuran said, he even looked apologetic, though it was incredibly fake. "I wonder where from you got this information… Still it's not enough to stop my company."

"Oh, yeah?" Gokudera asked skeptically.

Byakuran eyed him coldly.

"I can't understand what your intent is."

"Isn't it obvious?"

Millefiore boss ignored him this time instead waiting for Tsuna's reply; when it didn't come he continued:

"This may be true." His gaze lowered to the papers before staring at Tsuna again. "May be not. But maybe _if_ it is, this won't be enough for police."

"Who said those were going to police?" It was Gokudera again who answered.

"Hibari-san might find it very interesting." Tsuna mentioned offhandedly.

Byakuran's eyes narrowed momentary, then his features relaxed into a smile again; though it didn't go unnoticed. HibariKyoya. He didn't belong to the police or any other government organization, more like the man was on the other side – he and his people were rumored to be yakuza, but nonetheless, he was the most fearsome protector of the law in Namimori. All criminals were terrified by the mere idea of being 'bitten to death' asit was Hibari's favorite threat. It seemed even Byakuran had heard about him. But Vongola boss knew it won't be enough to scare him, though it did have some affect.

"So?" Tsuna inquired.

"Should I be scared now?" Byakuran played cheerfulness. "What do you think, Sho-chan?"

Shoichi for the first time since he entered the meeting lifted his pale green eyes from the flawless white upholstery of the sofa and looked at the Vongola representatives. His glance slid from one face to another not stopping for long on anyone, without exception.

"Sho-chan?" Byakuran asked in fake concern at delay.

"I'm not competent in such questions."

Byakuran turned away from him without comment and resumed his talk with Tsuna. Shoichi felt he could breath again without all those eyes staring at him, especially the violet pair which gaze he did his best to avoid all his time at Millefiore. Discretely he stole a look at Spanner who still seemed as uninterested in the whole deal as at the beginning. Nothing in him changed, not even attitude, and Shoichi wondered if their separation affected only him. For the redhead it was difficult to pretend emotionless though not long ago he didn't know anything other than that. Now every time Spanner moved, turned his head or adjusted his hand's position of the armrest Shoichi couldn't command his eyes not to wander.

Lost in a world of his own thoughts Shoichi didn't notice how the atmosphere in the office changed. Suddenly Byakurna stood up obviously furious, his speech full of deadly promises and threats. That was an end to the meeting. Vongola left taking his associates with him, Spanner was left alone with Byakuran yet again.

The redhead thought he noticed Spanner's longing look over one shoulder as the blond exited just before the door was slammed close, but too tired of false hope he persuaded himself that it was only imagination.

*****

The next week Tsuna arrived at Millefiore to talk to Byakurn again, this time there were only two of them in the sterile white office, and Shoichi waiting in a small room next door could only guess what they were talking about. Supposedly all the same thing now, but Vongola must have got some new way to threaten Byakuran also. Of course he suspected the way their talk went. A day later his suspicions were proved true.

Vongola with help of other organizations and strangely with assistance of Hibari Kyoya had 'defeated' Millefiore. Evidences they had previously wasn't enough but from their source they got more and with addition of private investigation of Varia, security department of Vongola, they finally managed to corner Byakuran. The project was stopped as well as other researches. The man himself had gotten away with impunity; Hibari's people were on his tail as well. Without a leader to run the corporation, Millefiore had fallen to pieces.

Shoichi was smiling broadly as he left a large building of the corporation which he silently started calling 'a prison' when Spanner left without any need to return. He was free; moreover he was the one to fight for it. After all, it was Shoichi who gave Vongola information on Byakuran's illegal projects.

*****

It was a sunny day in the beginning of spring, a cool wind blew by brushing Shoichi's hair as the young man stood before big glass doors – main entrance of Vongola Corp. He dreaded opening them, wandering what attitude will be displayed towards him. What would be Spanner's reaction? Will he care? Taking a long breath to calm himself he pushed heavy glass open and stepped over the threshold. He was greeted with a sight of big lobby with desks on one side and comfortable looking sofas on the other. Blond haired girl sitting behind closest desk greeted him friendly and was asking a standard question 'How can I help you?' but he wasn't listening further then 'How'. His attention was diverted completely by a blond figure slumped on the sofa. As Shoichi entered this person stood up and waited for him. Now this man was right in front of the redhead.

"Hello." Shoichi mumbled readjusting his glasses with awkward gesture.

"Hn…Hi." Spanner replied making the redhead smile at recognizable manner of speech.

"Could you help me findmy workplace here? I guess you should already know that Sawada-san offered me a job in Vongola and I agreed so…"

"Sure." Apathetic as always Spanner turned on his heel and lead the way.

Hesitating only a second Shoichi followed. When they left the lobby and dived into endless grey corridors the redhead gathered his courage to say words he wanted Spanner to hear for a long time.

"I…I missed you."

Spanner stopped but didn't turn around, all his posture seemed tense.

"I mean…after you left. I understand now why." The last bit he added hurriedly stumbling over words. "It's just…That time I didn't realize that Byakuran-san was pressing you as well. That time he hasn't yet told me about his _other_ projects. So I couldn't find a reason to what you did, so I concluded…that there must be something wrong with me."

Shoichi's voice had gone so quiet by the end, Spanner had to concentrate to distinguish the words. The redhead looked sideways already regretting asking. No other person ever had such a power of throwing him right into a center of a whirlpool of emotions. At times like this Shoichi only wanted to run away and hide in the darkest corner.

"You are perfect." Spanner's soft voice answered startling Shoichi. The warmth in the blonde's simple statement brought back his resolve.

Still not turning back Spanner continued his way down the corridor, the redhead let himself a smile and while his courage didn't waver he muttered:

"I'm very happy to see you again."

"Yeah." Spanner glanced at him, aquamarine eyes open and warm looking over his face before settling on staring right into pale green eyes of his creation. The mechanic was smiling too.

At this moment Shoichi realized that his feelings were understood and returned. Between them everything was going to be fine. Ever since the very beginning and through all months to this moment their relationship was only developing. They drifted apart but never stopped dreaming of being together, and further on they'll do their best to make sure it'll stay that way.

Shoichi's smile grew, pale green eyes gleamed behind thick rimmed glasses.

"So…where am I going to be working?" He asked casually like nothing ha happened, like _before_.

"Third level under the ground. Green corridor. Second door on the left side. Right beside my workshop."

They continued their walk side by side.

*****

Another six months had passed by. Spanner didn't even notice how quickly it happened. Somehow he knew that days went replaced by new ones but his senses didn't register how time flew. His mind was full with work, new creations and mostly – Shoichi. Somehow the redhead became the highest priority in his life, a center of his little personal universe. But the blond mechanic didn't mind it – he knew that for Shoichi it was the same way.

There, in Vongola, they could work together, spend days debating over new projects. In free time, which both of them now had more then enough, they crawled out of their laboratories, tired but happy, and explored the outer world. Spanner never bothered to do it by himself and Shoichi never had time for it before.

They were free and able to blissfully enjoy it. Spanner and Shoichi never talked about the future; what would be with them in, for instance, five years, ten, fifteen…they didn't want to think about it in their new found love for ordinary life. Just enjoying being close to each other, having life full of challenging work and annoying but friendly colleagues – that was enough.

Shoichi suspected that even in long time no matter how many years in the future it still would be enough. They had their work and they had each other. So while nothing can stop them from having dreams of never being alone – they will be happy. Nothing and no one would ever shatter their happy ending.


End file.
